April is the Cruelest Month.

Well, not really, but it certainly feels that way sometimes. The sheer volume of things I have to get done this month is already crushing me under its (volume)/(density). Reading T.S. Eliot and Gatsby back to back in English and Euro is rather depressing its own right.

This long weekend has been pretty low-key. I had a ton of work to do that I've all pushed to today. Yippee! Perhaps Sunday is the cruelest day of the week.

Thursday night Karmen came over to finish watching Devdas--that was the plan anyhow. We actually just lazed around in the basement, chatting, gorging on Canadian/Australian chocolate, and communicating through noodles. Made some plans about college, complained about parents and inane financial aid offices--nice stuff.

Saturday night my parents dragged me to another Asian parent party at Ning's house, except all the college kids were away. Weird thing was the parents had name tags on, giving it a whiff of formal networking. My brother, the dear brother he is, wrote a name tag for me (all the letters backwards of course), and tried to stick in on my butt. Kevin was there and so was another sophomore who kept asking the two of us about college--it freaked me out! I've gotten so jaded about the college admissions process that whenever underclassmen ask me about it, I just want to tell them, "Fuck college." Yea, not a good attitude. Shouldn't scare the underlings.

So of course, all the parents tried to dig college news out of me too, but I stubbornly repeated my mantra of choosing between Chicago and Rice. Alas, no college news stays uncovered in Asian parent gossip circles, so the questions soon turned into, "What do you do to get into Harvard?" When Kevin made an effort to honestly answer those questions, the only thing that would stick in my mind was, "How did I get into Harvard???" Seriously, I still ask myself that. I really don't understand how I got in, some weird fluke in the system. Gah, inferiority complex is already kicking in--another minus in the Harvard column.

As all Asian parents are again baffled by why anyone would ever choose another school over Harvard, Kevin said his mom told him to, "Convince Sarah to go to Harvard." I don't know, but talking over prefrosh stuff actually made me pretty excited. If Chicago continues to be stingy about money, I probably will pack my bags for Cambridge--all of 40 miles away from home.

Edit: Harvard is intimidating...maybe not. I've changed my mind 17 times already.